French RSVP vs Nigerian RSVP

Mambo vipi,

I bring you greetings from Kenya, by asking, ‘what’s up?’ in Swahili language.  So, the first half of the year is coming to a close. It has been mixed feelings across different circles. Our heart goes to those who lost their lives and properties in the inferno of yesterday in London.

Today, I will want to touch on parties typically called ‘Owanbe’, a word postulated by the Late General Robert Adeyinka Adebayo, former Governor of Western Region Nigeria. Every party has a stipulated budget, this primarily determines the provision to be made for the guests. We all have the good intentions when planning our parties so as not to fail our guests. Let us consider, RSVP in France and in Nigeria.

The acronym RSVP in French means Répondez s'il vous plaît meaning "Please respond", it is required by the party planner to confirmation if the person would honour the invitation. Also, some people use it in the context of "Regrets only", or a popular modern variation that implies "if you do not reply, that will be taken as an acceptance."

Interestingly, the comic definition of RSVP to Nigerians is “Rice and Stew Very Plenty”. I doff my cap for the person who created this, however, it has impacted negatively on planning a party. No one would mention it that he did not respond to ‘RSVP” to confirm availability. Also, people whose name are not listed on RSVP take offense as if they are not important in the organization of the party.

What’s the crux of the gist? When an invitation is not responded to, it leads to two basic situations- surplus provision or insufficient provision. Planning for an event is as important as the confirmation gotten from the guests.

Equally, when we are taking up other cultures, we should import it rightly into our environment so that we can give the desired result. Things should be placed in proper perspective if we want results akin to that of the originating culture.

Would you respond rightly to invitations henceforth?

Cheers!

Olutayo

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OFFICER vs OFFICE

Hi,

It has been a while that I came this way. Thank God for keeping us till day. I hope you had a wonderful Easter celebration- the holiday afforded me the opportunity to visit different families I have not seen in recent times.  It was a fulfilling experience.

As norm, I will want to start with a little story about a retired man. The man rose to become a C-Suite Executive in his hale days. He flew first class but since he retired, he became a staunch flyer of the economy class whenever he travelled. Let's discuss Officer vs Office.

An officer is someone paid to occupy an office because of his expertise and value addition to an organization. Many times, he is also enhanced through the office. He has opportunities to travel at the company's expense and attend training in ivy - league institutions. An officer could win awards and gain recognition from different quarters. There are a lot of peeks associated with being a resourceful officer.

The office is the position available to any qualified person for a certain time. Time in this context could a fixed duration for those elected and till retirement for career officer. In colloquial terms in Nigeria, "soldier go, soldier come; barracks remain". 

The use of an office could either make or mar the occupant years after. In fact, his children might partake of the good legacies, or otherwise, of their parents while in office. It is wise to make judicious use of one's office to benefit humanity in general.

What will be said about you and I when we have relinquish our various offices. The ball is in our court, let's play it right.

Have a blessed week.

Cheers!

Olutayo

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LAWS vs ACQUIESCE

M kana mon,

I have come to you today in the similitude of a Gokana man, one of the languages in Rivers State, Nigeria meaning "I salute You", while you will respond with "E zira" meaning "We return your salute."

In Nigeria, there has always been endless complaints about non-adherence to laws that should guide us in our daily lives as citizens. Earlier this year, an Associate Professor in the United States, Saheed Aderinto shared a memo stating that "a permit was required to slaughter domestic animals (even on religious festivals) in Nigeria. Source: West African Pilot, February 13, 1943." Is this 74 year old law effective in Nigeria? Let’s discuss Laws vs Acquiesce.

Laws according to the dictionary are the body of rules and standards issued by the legislative body, or to be applied by courts and similar authorities. Of a fact, all religious bodies have laws that guide their members.

Acquiesce means to accept or consent by silence. It is an agreement to abide by the laws governing a body either an association, state, country. Acquiesce hold sway on anyone within the geographical territory.  Unfortunately, ignorance is not an excuse in the court of law. 

We all know these words but we do not make them work. Laws would continually be on paper while we all act contrarily. The dis-functionality of the society can be resolved by adhering to the laws of the land.

Laws should help us to live a meaningful life and help us avoid regrettable tales. If religious tenets are adhered to, the world would be a better place.

Would we take to these laws (instructions) so that we do not suffer grave consequences?

Enjoy the rest of the day.

Cheers!

Olutayo 

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INTERNALLY DISPLACED vs EXTERNALLY DISPLACED.

Abokina,

In Hausa language, the lingua Franca of Northern Nigeria, it means my friend.  It is already turning white in some parts of the world and it is currently hazy here. I wish you a beautiful Christmas in advance.  

As a country, we have been battling Boko Haram in the last few years and it has led  to the death of many people both civilian and military. Our hearts are with their families and we pray that they will be eternally consoled. Let's dig deep as we discuss internally displaced and externally displaced in various lights. Both displacement can be summed up in a Yorùbá proverb "eniti o so ile nu ti so apo iya ko" meaning he who has lost his identity has keep a bag of torture.

The internally displaced people are those that have been sacked from their homelands and they are refugees in their fatherland. Unfortunately, the reports are more disheartening because they are malnourished and the funds that should be used in catering for them is being embezzled in their country of birth. The government keeps paying lips service to optimally caring for them. 

Another set of internally displaced people are those who are neither accepted in the city they reside and their country home. This is evident in documents such as state of origin, local government identification letter, Federal Character and others in Nigeria. All of these have reduced the opportunities available to people and this has led to brain drain.

The externally displaced people are those have lost their sense of their own identity based on some external influences despite being in close proximity to their culture and language. I strongly believe that regardless of the level of foreign civilisation, if your own culture is not promoted, it will die a natural death. 

Some years ago, we were having Generation X and now, we are having Generation Z. People are getting lost even in their homeland. There are many families resident in the cities who neither know their country home nor are told about the place. The question, "who will build and promote your country home?"

Either you are internally or externally displaced, you can rewrite your history; you can create a new order. If you are internally displaced, brace up to rebuild your home community; if you are internally displaced, work towards improving your language & country home with your expertise if you are externally displaced.

Whatever you do differently will engrave your name on the roll call of honour one day.

Have a nice transition into 2017.

Cheers

Olutayo

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FIRST HUSBAND vs SUBSEQUENT HUSBANDS

E káasan,

That’s the greetings of a Yoruba person which means ‘Good afternoon’. It has been some weeks that I last came this way but it is all for good! The tap is still gushing but the demand of this time makes it seems like it is seizing from my end. I am sure the wind of the yuletide is blowing all around you; either it White Christmas or Hazy Christmas; May we all do it in good health.

There is a Yorùbá proverb, ‘ti obinrin o ba dan ile oko meji wo; ko ni mo eyi to san’ which means, if a woman never attempts two matrimonial homes; she will not know the most pleasant of both homes. We would want to consider this saying in the light of the first husband and subsequent husbands. However, this can be applied to all areas of life including our career.

The first husband is usually the stage of exposition from being naïve. The first husband has a lot of role to play in one’s life as it determines how wild and insatiable one would be in later years. The experience also determines if the person will want to hang on or find an exit route out of the union. For example, if the first company that one works with pays well; gives a lot of allowances and encourages growth; many people would not bother to seek for employment elsewhere until the statutory retirement age.

Subsequent husbands, from the second husband upward, usually, are tasked on many sides especially when there was a very damaging experience from the first union. This could have maligned the ability of the person to trust and stay loyal. As such, the husband strives to convince beyond all reasonable doubt that he can care and sustain the person. Unfortunately, the person coming into the union would be very sceptical and would have developed either a cantankerous, violent or defensive mind-set.

In all, some people will never go beyond the first marriage; some will prefer the second marriage; some will appreciate the first marriage while they are in the second marriage and some will regret both marriages.

I would plead with everyone, wherever you find yourself; please be the best so that we can create valuable experiences for others and not marred experiences. For those who are yet to make a choice, kindly examine your choice, if it will lead you to the Promised Land or an impediment to your progress.

Have a great weekend ahead.

Cheers!

Olutayo

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PARALYSIS VS ELLIPSIS

Kowure,

This is my special morning greetings to you in Kulere language of Bokkos local government area of Plateau State, Nigeria. It is another good time to share with you. Hope you are earnestly looking forward to the end of the year- the most expensive and fun - filled time of the year?

Today, I will tell you the story of my friend who had an entrepreneurial drive; he went to his uncle to discuss his intentions. His uncle, gave him ten reasons why he should hold on to his career as his boss would reward his loyalty down the line. What should he do? However, as a convinced young man, he moved on with faith. Let's think together on Paralysis versus Ellipsis.

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FOREWARNING vs RESCUING

Muli Shani,

It is such a great opportunity coming your way again this week. Hope you have been making the best of this month? It's way more than half, what have we achieved so far? I am saying "hi" in Bemba language of Zambia.

I will be starting this edition with the post proverbial of a saying in Yorùbá language. *A forewarned crippled man does not die in the war; howbeit, the wise one.  Let's go on with the topic of today, Forewarning vs Rescuing.

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FRIVOLITY vs NECESSITY

Mai Shamwari,

I am excited coming your way again today after some weeks break. I have been on recess but I am not depressed. Life has different folds of challenges and I hope we are on top of all the pebbles thrown at us. I am saying ‘My People’ in Shona language of Zimbabwe.

There is a story of a young professional who is excelling in his career. He had a lot of people who report to him ranging from drivers to his colleagues. He had luxurious cars; high quality phones and travel out of the country at will. Oddly, he had a need to change his apartment; he scouted for another apartment; he got another one apartment; he paid and the final process was that he should meet the landlord of the house. On the day of visiting the landlord, the person that can out to his amazement was his driver in the office. Let’s think together, at what point are our acquisition frivolities or necessities?

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BLOATED EGO vs MASSAGED EGO

Makadini,

Last week was defined by a friend as a ‘mid-term’ for workers, it was at the beginning of the second half of the year so the holiday felt so good, so short and I felt like it should continue. However, the economy suffered largely for it. I just greeted you in Shona language of Zimbabwe saying ‘Hello’.

There is a story of a fairly old female trader who buys her goods from people who are as young as her children. As an African, this act was extraordinaire as many elderly people cheat younger ones. They feel very important when she addresses them with respect and this made it easy for her to get whatever she wants from them. She mentioned one day, ‘I do not feel foolish by respecting them because it deducts nothing from me. They have even respected me more because of my lifestyle. Being respectful is beneficial to the humble at every point in life.’ Let us think together as we consider Bloated Ego versus Massaged Ego.

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MANAGER vs FOUNDER

Photo credit: www.redeye.firstround.com

Otume,

I am back from the Igede clan in Benue State and I am now with my friends from Degema, Rivers State, saying "hello" to everyone. May we always encounter favour as we anticipate a new month.

There is a certain man who was hired as a manager; he had great ideas and was willing to share it with the founder of his company. The founder does whatever he wants at every point in time. Out of frustration, the young man started executing his ideas without permission and this got him into trouble with the founder who felt slighted by the actions of the man. Let's think together as we discussed, Manager vs Founder.

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GENERALIZATION vs INDIVIDUALITY

Anginyi Nyiam,

My affiliation with the people of Igede in Benue State continues today. I have come to ‘My People’ just like they call it. This week is bombarded with many activities and I am hopeful that it will all end in praise.

Have you ever heard older people talk about certain tribes that they have some traits as such; they will make an inference advising their children and relatives to desist from associating them. Also, some communities are renowned for the production of academic doctors and professors. Interestingly, some people pride themselves with these traits.

Generalization is a situation when people of certain clans have been stigmatized. This happens intra-tribal and inter-tribal. I know that the three major ethnic groups in Nigeria have different banter on one another. This generalization has been negatively affected a lot of loving relationships and how people are treated in the case of any eventuality.

Individuality is about a person- the lifestyle, the attitude, the character. A contact with a person from a certain community might be the beginning and the conclusion of the traits from a community. The trait found in these people is not as a result of their ethnicity but based on their personality.

What is the crux of today’s discussion? Do not make people stigmatize others from the same ethnicity with you because of your behaviour. Also, you can stand out as a different person regardless of the ‘negative’ attributes associated with your tribe across generations.

Take time to rewrite history and not continue with negative attribute from your homeland.

Cheers!

Olutayo

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DISDAIN vs DEFERENCE

Photo credit: www.wordpandit.com

Aligwu Nyiam,

Trust you had a great week? I am still in solidarity with my Benue friends; I have come to you in Igede language saying ‘my friend’. Let me congratulate our Mothers; I am proud to be associated with different category of women who have impacted my life positively over the years: my daughter, my wife, aunties, my mother, my grandmothers and many foster women. I hope that one day; I will have the opportunity to write more about them.

I do not know if this applies to all cultures but I am sure that there are certain people that we revere and would not want to ignore their words ‘mi o lẹ ko ọrọ siyin lẹnu’. Many times, we unwillingly take to their stand because of the person involved. The response is usually you are so dear to me that is why I am taking this advice, ‘e tobi lọwọ mi’. Let’s go to today’s discourse, disdain versus deference.

Disdain is a state of feeling of contempt for anyone regarded as unworthy, haughty, contempt and scorn. When a person is showing this trait, the person does not want to the opinion of the person. Many times, even at close range, the word of that person is not taken with a pinch of salt.

Deference is the state of utmost respect. The person has the ability to ‘correct, chastise and impact on your life. People are held in deference are usually more experienced than the person in question, they would have impacted on your life and their contributions to the previous achievements cannot be overlooked.

What’s the crux of the matter, everyone has someone that is held in deference; they have the ‘reset’ button to the person’s character when some wrong attitudes set in. For every relationship, locate that person your associate holds in deference and report the person so that restoration can happen before things turn worse.

The challenge for everyone is this, can you be held in deference? Even your children, do they look to you in deference? Have you lost your deference to some flimsy attitudes of life? All category of leaders at all facet of life must not toy with his deference because many times, once it is lost, it cannot be recovered.

There is a respected leader in everyone and it must not be lost to disdain.

Have a Wonderful Mothers Day.

Cheers!

Olutayo

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TATTOO vs LALI

Ior Av,

It’s a wet Thursday in Lagos, Nigeria and I am glad it rained. People have been enduring the high weather temperature in the last few days. It is the day of relieve and we look forward to more relieve as the rainy season sets in fully. I have come in the similitude of a Tiv from Benue State, Nigeria saying, 'My People'.

As a lad, there are names on my Grandmother’s arm, she told me it is called “Soju” and why she had different names written on her skin. When I got to Ilorin for my tertiary education; I came in contact with another intricate patterns drawn on women in the market and some corporate environment, I asked questions about it and I got to know this as one of the traditional fashion style called “Lali”. By the time, I got to Maiduguri, Borno State, before the Boko Haram days; I was used to seeing it on women. Interestingly, when I returned to Lagos, I came in touch with another set of patterns called tattoo. Let’s reflect on today’s Versus Series as we consider Tattoo vs Lali.

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OUTER MOTIVATION vs INNER CONVICTION

Ior Av,

Despite all that is happening in Benue State, not political though, I have decided to associate with them today. I just said my people in Tiv language from North-Central, Nigeria. How it has been a great day for you? Am trying to try (one of the phrases that I learnt from my lecturers)

There are certain children that are seen tilting towards a particular skill early in life, for example Olumide Oresegun, the painter whose work went viral online recently had started drawing since the age of 4. Interestingly, his parents did not deter them from pursuing his dream while some parents want children who would be 'learned' professionals. Do you have an inner conviction or you need outer motivation alone as you pursue your dreams? Let’s reason together.

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WEAKENED NORMALCY vs STRENGHTENED STRETCH

Iniebinotu,

There is nobody who does not want to associate with people who can speak their language and this is one of the ways of being favoured. Interestingly, some people understand other’s language more than their mother tongue because they are resident in those areas. I am saying ‘My People’ in Izon (Ijaw) language of the people of the riverine communities in South-South, Nigeria.

Children are the most encouraged set of people on earth. You are being encouraged by your parents; pampered by your grannies (apologies to those who never had that experience); got gifts from uncles and aunties. However, when you get to certain heights in life; you are being encouraged in a way that looks chastising; you are encouraged to break some limited to set new records. Eventually, when one grows out of that age, one starts to appreciate the efforts invested into one at that time.

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BUS DRIVER vs CAR DRIVER

Mutane,

‘People’ that is my greetings today in Hausa language. Hope it has been a great day thus far? Most especially at this time, for those in Nigeria, when there is fuel scarcity! It has been a great challenge commuting from one place to another. Imagine, Third Mainland Bridge has been free lately because many people have stopped driving. Hopefully, traffic will return next week when the scarcity is over.

Have you ever noticed the difference in the driving of a bus driver and a car driver in Lagos? You will be amazed at the roughness and the carefulness of both drivers. Let’s think together as we draw some inferences on both driving styles.

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DESPERATION vs AMBITION

Iniebinotu,

I have come to address ‘My People’ according to the Izon (Ijaw) language of South-South, Nigeria. You know one thing that has happened to Nigerian languages is the modification by Westerners during the era of colonization. I still hold this opinion strongly that we should either revert to the original names or at least, let them reflect in our historical books. However, that’s not what we have come to discuss today.

There are certain people that we know either in business, sports, entertainment and other spheres of life that started their practice before us and we can tell their success story over time. When we see them in the media, we utter statements like, ‘I know him very well; he was my classmate’ etc. However, the journey to stardom can be in different ways; some are out of desperation while some are basically pure ambition.

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EXTERNAL ADVISORY vs IN-HOUSE ADVISORY

Iniekiowei,

If I were to be a singer, I would have been able to prove my dexterity with all the languages that I have used in greeting you; today I am fraternizing with my Ijaw friends from the Niger-Delta region

by calling you, ‘my friend’.

There is a certain organization that discovered huge revenue leakages and all the loopholes needed to be blocked immediately. The organization ‘ran’ to a renowned consultancy firm to request for their professional services. When the consultancy firm wanted to start working; they requested for all the documents from staff within the organization and at the end of the agreed timeframe, they submitted a report. There are professionals within this organization that can provide the same result but it was not entrusted to them. This correlates with the scriptures, ‘a prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.’

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STOOGE vs STAND OUT!

Morning,

It is a great day and welcome to a new week. The year is just starting and I am sure we are all preparing as much as possible to attain God-ordained heights for us this year.

There are many stories that we have heard about people who cannot exercise their rights in an office because they take instructions from a mentor, godfather, benefactor etc and this becomes obvious to their followers. The Yoruba have a saying, ‘ewo ni ka j’oye awodi; ka ma le gbe adiye’ meaning why would you be a hawk that can’t hunt for chick. Let’s think together about a stooge or someone who stands out!

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PLAYING ROLES vs REAL ROLES

Ndawatun,

This is a popular greeting amongst the Kanuris’ of Borno State, North-East, Nigeria; however I do not know the meaning but the response is ‘Kelewa sele’ if you meet a black man with tribal marks that runs from the forehead to the nose and also another long one on the cheeks; you may try this greetings. That would make you appreciate the diversity of Nigeria.

Let’s proceed into today’s discussion; playing roles versus real roles. At a point in time, we have had the opportunity of watching a movie. We would definitely have known that the play series of roles in different movies with different story-lines but this does not mean that they act out these roles in real life.

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